Real stories from real caregivers
I cared for my mom alone for three years. Didn't tell anyone how bad it was getting. Last month I finally called my sister and just said "I can't do this anymore." She came. I cried for about an hour. Sharing this in case anyone else is still holding it together alone — you don't have to.
Stage 3 dementia. He looked right at me and asked "who are you?" I said "I'm your daughter." He smiled and said "you seem nice." I held it together until I got to my car. Is this something you ever get used to?
I keep two calendars now — one for my mom's appointments and one for mine. Mine has exactly two things on it each week that are non-negotiable: Saturday morning coffee alone, Sunday evening walk. Protecting those two things has kept me sane. Highly recommend.
Mom passed six months ago after four years of me as her primary caregiver. I want to say something to those of you still in it: the love you are giving right now matters enormously, even when it doesn't feel like it. And it does get easier. Not better, exactly. Just different.
My brother lives 20 minutes away. Has visited twice in 14 months. Calls every few weeks to ask how things are going, offers vague "let me know if you need anything," and that's it. I have stopped asking for specific help because the explanations of why he can't are more exhausting than doing it myself. How do you deal with this?
Got my dad to eat a full meal for the first time in a week. He even made a joke after. I know this sounds small but I have been so worried. Came here to share with people who understand why this matters.